Warnings About the Baconator

By On June 21, 2007 · 46 Comments · In Bacon

Here are some warnings that should be on the packaging of Wendy’s Baconator. If you think of your own warnings, email them to me and I will ad them to the list.

Warning:
* People over the age to 65 should not eat the Baconator.
* Nursing or Pregnant women should not come in contact with the Baconator.
* After eating the Baconator if you have an erection lasting longer then 4 hours, contact your doctor.
* You may feel chest pains while consuming the Baconator.
* Chuck Norris had trouble finishing a Baconator.
* Keep away from an open flame.
* If your Baconator asks you about Sarah Conner, eat it before it gets away.
* Do not operate heavy machinery for 3 hours after consuming a Baconator.
* Driving and eating a Baconator, may cause serious injury.
* Do not use the Baconator as a projectile

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  • http://www.danecookfansite.com Dane Cook

    Can it be consumed with alcohol? lol

  • http://www.mrbaconpants.com Mosley

    yes! Bacon and beer are amazing together!

  • Sinjinator

    Baconator may be larger than it appears.
    Do not stack more than 3 Baconators without supports.
    Bacon end up.
    Children must be accompanied by parent or legal guardian while consuming Baconator.
    Do not follow Baconator into construction site.
    Baconator stops at all railroad crossings.
    Refrigerate any leftovers and consume within 17 weeks.
    Do not taunt Baconator.
    If Baconator arrives naked, it will be back.

  • http://zealouszombie.blogspot.com Burgy

    The baconator isn’t very good. It mostly tastes like grease and hickory smoke flavoured chemicals. It dripped grease on the table, much like a leaky tap drips water steadily.

    And the bacon wasn’t crispy. It was rubbery and stringy. Gross.

  • http://www.mrbaconpants.com Mosley

    Its kills me to say that I agree with you.

    I had one last week and I just thought it was the crapy Wendy’s I went too. I didnt think that they were that bad everywere.

    But I like the name and idea. So I guess I am just going to have to make my own Baconator. That sounds like a good reason for a cookout!!!

  • megaballs

    do not feed baconator after midnight

  • http://www.mrbaconpants.com Mosley

    … or it may turn in to a gremlin

  • mg

    Place your diapers in the freezer the night before you eat a Baconator.

  • Coolwhip

    …or it will turn into the Juggernaut.

  • http://www.mrbaconpants.com Mosley

    ummmm…. big meaty juggernaut.

  • Big Wally Dan

    i ate 2 of them yesterday and put on some extra mayonaise as mine were a little dry. they were pretty good, although i drank a six pack before I ate the burgers.

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  • Alexander Csamaj

    I have had the opportunity to taste the Baconator several times after
    consuming it. …. There was another chance. It doesn’t taste as good the
    second, third, fourth time, after eating it. The burps… awwwww. Time to
    hit the crapper. awwwwwww. Not necessarily good.

    awwwwwwwwww

  • http://www.mrbaconpants.com Mosley

    Alexander,

    haha! I been there and teasted that! awwwwww

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  • http://www.petitiononline.com/wendybbc/ Tony

    Yeah, the Baconator is pretty unhealthy, what isin’t tho? Still I really miss the Big Bacon Classic, compared to the new 830 calorie monster.

    Wendy’s basically removed the Big Bacon Classic and replaced it with this heart and artery destroyer. There is a petition online to bring back the Big Bacon Classic. (which I feel is vastly healthier and tastier)

    http://www.petitiononline.com/wendybbc/

  • Jussieboi

    I had the baconator and soon after I had to have a double bypass surgery. It was worth it.

    *Do not eat Baconator if you value life.

  • http://www.mrbaconpants.com Mosley

    haha! well i am glad your still alive!

  • Sirithil

    If you really want a Big Bacon Classic, say, “I want a single cheeseburger. Add bacon and (list of ingredients) on that, and put it on a kaiser bun.”

    Instant Big Bacon Classic. Easy-peasy.

  • http://www.plognark.com Plognark

    Seriously, do not EVER EVER eat a Baconator while on that new diet pill Alli. Seriously man…

    http://www.plognark.com/?q=node/427

    Learn from my mistakes people.

  • http://myspace.com/jbroadfoot jeremy

    do not taunt the baconator

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  • http://www.greatpubcrawl.com/ Keith W.

    Tony: I went into Wendy’s and ordered just a Big Bacon Classic, and they gave it to me. It’s not on the menu anymore but apparently you can order it anyway.

  • xenabot

    the baconator-
    i’ll be faat.

  • butch wright

    Fat,more fat and lots of fat .This plus the starch ,cholesterol and all of the salt and other chemicals are enough to a sumo wrestler !

  • http://www.terpski.com HedonismBot

    The Baconator is not intended to prevent sexually transmitted diseases. May contain meat. In very rare cases, serious side effects may occur, including unsatisfied hunger or comfortable, settled stomach. The Baconator did it in the study with the candlestick. May not actually contain meat. Always enjoy the Baconator responsibly. Do not spell as “Bacon8er” as this may anger the Baconator. The Baconator is people. Any descriptions, recordings, rebroadcast, or transcriptions of the Baconator without the expressed written consent of Wendy’s and Major League Baseball are forbidden and punishable by making you eat another one.

  • http://www.terpski.com HedonismBot

    Also, it would appear that our claim that the Baconator was involved with Osama Bin Laden was based on bad intelligence. Apparently it is in fact not a weapon of mass destruction, but rather a weapon of ass destruction. God Bless ‘Merica.

  • http://www.mrbaconpants.com Mosley

    hahahaha haha!!! a weapon of ass destruction! haha!!!!

    I sadly know that is ture! ;)

  • http://www.retro.net/index.html retro

    I do love the classics.

  • Casey

    I think the Baconator WILL prevent STD’s. Lets face it, if you eat enough of these things noone in their state of mind and sinus will want to have sex with you. Maybe we can stop handing out condoms in schools and stock the lunch rooms with Baconators.

  • chisai

    I drooled over The Baconator commercials and hit Wendy’s after a couple weeks of them gracing my television. There is very little food as tasty as a Bacon Cheeseburger. Unless it’s from Wendy’s and is called The Baconator. In that case it is disgusting and gross and inedible. It was just a pile ‘o grease. The the bacon was all gummy and gross, the flavor of the meat was horrible. I never leave food, having been a proud member of The Clean Plate Club since I was a child, but I couldn’t even get halfway thru that disgusting sandwich.

  • http://www.mrbaconpants.com Mosley

    @ chisai
    It pains me to report that I agree with you. Yes I love all things bacon but this was to much. I think if I made a home madwe baconator it would be amazing.

    Sorry about being kicked out of the Clean Plate Club. Maybe if you tell them the situation they will let you back in.

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  • Lee

    If you want the bacon to be crispy in the baconator try replacing the wendys bacon with that ready to serve bacon you microwave. Much better than those shameful strips of rubber Wendys puts in.

  • 2oonhed

    - Do not leave Baconator unattended with the bacon clearly visible.
    - Baconator is designed to be detectable by infrared laser and/or thermal imaging for “over the horizon” and “around the corner” sensing capabilities.
    - Baconator is insured by the FDIC.
    - If your Baconator fails, contact the authorities by dialing 911.

  • http://www.quitsmokingpillreviews.com Peter

    I’m curious to know what are your thoughts on where the the spicy baconator fits into all of this? But it’s so true, I did feel pretty sick after I ate one. I should have read this post prior to having it. Thanks for looking out for the well being of the human population. It’s nice to know someone cares.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Dino-De-Lellis/568880260 Delellis

    Hahahaha , so funny I especially like point 4:
    “After eating the Baconator if you have an erection lasting longer then 4 hours, contact your doctor.”

    Well I might as well indulge on it while I’m relatively young because when I’m middle aged I’ll be morosely eating veggies and fish so that I’ll live longer and not die of a heart attack.

  • David

    THE BACONATER IS FUCKING!!!! DELCIOUS!!! ITS AMAZINGLY GOOD
    STOP CRITIZING IT PLEASSEE I HAVE ATEN OVER!1000 BACONATERS AND AM STILL KICKIN GOOOO BACONNNNNn8TORRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • http://www.mrbaconpants.com Jason Mosley

    You are mistaken the baconator SUCKS!

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  • http://whyareyousofat.wordpress.com/ Dean

    The Baconator will explode your ass, gut, and chin.*

    *These statements have not been evaluated by the FDA. This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease.

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  • EPA

    The Baconator via swine flu spreading disease filled fast food will therefore end your life. Please do not consume when you still want to live. Thank you.

  • dickster1

    I was gonna try the Baconator on for size; but after reading all of these comments, It scared the Hell out of me….

  • scott

    baconator may suddenly accelerate to dangerous speeds