Archie McPhee’s new product, the Bacon Tuxedo Box, is a cruel joke. If you fallen victim to their April fool’s joke, the Bacon Tuxedo, you will know why. Let me set up a scenario for you to help illustrate my point.
It’s your bacon loving friend’s birthday and you buy him a gift. You then think he or she would get a kick out of it if you placed it in the Bacon Tuxedo Box wrapped with bacon gift wrap. The big day comes and you give your gift to the bacon lover.
As soon as your give it to them they will know you are a true friend that they can trust, since you obviously know them well. They will slowly unwrap the gift, enjoying the bacon gift wrap you used. They will then start to notice that the package underneath also has something to do with bacon. This would trigger them to tear apart that rest of the wrapping like a hungry wolf on a herd of legless sheep.
When they unveil that box they will stare at it with wide eyes. They will slowly turn the box looking at every side. Then with a deep breath they begin to open the box. Just before they look inside they will look at you and say, “This is the best gift ever”!
As they pull out the gift you really got them they will have a bewilder look on their face. There first thought would not be that you played a joke on them but that the store somehow messed up. Everyone in the room will feel awkward because your bacon love is not laughing.
In the awkward silence you will start to chuckle hoping that it will help them get the joke. Don’t worry, they will get the joke and play along like it did bother them. They might even thank you for funny box along with your gift, but deep inside they are hurting.
If you use the Bacon Tuxedo gift box you’re going to cause your bacon loving friend a roller coaster ride of emotions. They will have extreme happiness followed by shock and then sadness. They may even begin to have trust issues with you.
I hope now you will not use this box for gifts to bacon loving friends. Instead, use it for gifts to your enemies and/or smelly vegans.
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Jason Mosley (aka Mr. Baconpants) is the king of all bacon. He started this blog in 2004 to share his love of bacon and beer. 
Sean Brett (aka Bacon Knight) is the amazing co-host of Bacon Live, the weekly audio/video podcast about bacon and more.
Beth Mosley (aka Mrs. Baconpants) is a lover of good food and beer. She enjoys cooking and trying new recipes (with bacon).
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