In a recent article, they decided to slam the food network for its chefs making fatty food. The extremely boring story went on to say that they no longer liked the food networks programming.

The author goes on saying that they used to have good hosts that made good recipes and all they have now is “…a bunch of bozos and created clowns…” They then go on to slam the recipes saying they’re so bad that they are “…killing people, one recipe at a time.”

If only we could go back to the good old days of the Food Network with respectable hosts and healthy food. Respectable and healthy like Emeril Lagasse, the man that cooked in front of a crowd that screamed with ecstasy whenever he would add a pound of butter to any dish.

By far the worst part of this article was the headline “Paula Deen and her Monkey Bread Are Killing You.” You leave Paula Deen alone. She is a sweet old lady that makes food the way it was before health Nazis started demanding that the world eat healthier. We don’t need you to tell us, that when Paula makes a bacon cheese burger between two doughnuts that we shouldn’t eat that every day. And what if I want to eat it every day? What gives you the right to judge me? I bet you liberal hippie health nuts would never judge a gay man for his lifestyle choice. But you sure as hell would judge a fat person.

I got some news for you, We’re loud, we’re proud, and we’re fat.

By Sean Brett

Editor Note: I was going to put a picture of Monkey Balls (the food) on this post, but I was to chicken to type Monkey Balls in to Google. – JM

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