In a recent article, they decided to slam the food network for its chefs making fatty food. The extremely boring story went on to say that they no longer liked the food networks programming.

The author goes on saying that they used to have good hosts that made good recipes and all they have now is “…a bunch of bozos and created clowns…” They then go on to slam the recipes saying they’re so bad that they are “…killing people, one recipe at a time.”

If only we could go back to the good old days of the Food Network with respectable hosts and healthy food. Respectable and healthy like Emeril Lagasse, the man that cooked in front of a crowd that screamed with ecstasy whenever he would add a pound of butter to any dish.

By far the worst part of this article was the headline “Paula Deen and her Monkey Bread Are Killing You.” You leave Paula Deen alone. She is a sweet old lady that makes food the way it was before health Nazis started demanding that the world eat healthier. We don’t need you to tell us, that when Paula makes a bacon cheese burger between two doughnuts that we shouldn’t eat that every day. And what if I want to eat it every day? What gives you the right to judge me? I bet you liberal hippie health nuts would never judge a gay man for his lifestyle choice. But you sure as hell would judge a fat person.

I got some news for you, We’re loud, we’re proud, and we’re fat.

By Sean Brett

Editor Note: I was going to put a picture of Monkey Balls (the food) on this post, but I was to chicken to type Monkey Balls in to Google. – JM

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7 Responses to Lime Life Blogger Bashes Fat People

  1. Aaron says:

    Hey Sean you should try Paula Deen’s Cheesy Banana Ham and Bacon casserole.. that’s fattening!

    My favorite old Food TV show was Two Fat Ladies. They cooked everything in buckets of butter and lard, and then topped everything with more butter and lard. They died from it, but I bet they went happily!

    Health food is hard to digest, and will probably kill you faster than butter. I say eat what you want, not what THEY tell you to!

    I’m gonna go put slices of butter on slices of bacon, and eat them with a cup of healthy green tea.

  2. Yep, seems to be going around. When Good Morning America labeled me a Baconographer in their coverage of the Bacon Takedown, this guy took offense. He even told me my parents aren’t proud of me. Nice, huh?

    Who cares, if you want to eat heathy there’s no one stopping you, go right ahead. To each his own.

  3. Emily says:

    I loved that Two Fat Ladies show. haha It was hysterical. I think I used to watch it on the BBC.

  4. Tasha says:

    Skinny people are so bitter about the crap that they have to eat to stay thin that they’re taking it out on the rest of us. Screw them! Without us they wouldn’t look so good by comparison. Btw, I typed “monkey balls” into google & videos of the animals came up, lol. nice call Mr. Baconpants.

  5. Jason Mosley says:

    Guys I hate to break it to you all but I am a skinny person.

    Fat people hate me because I have the gift to eat what ever I want and remain skinny (most skinny people hate me for the same reason).

    Don’t worry I am sure once I hit 30 all this bacon will catch up with me. 😉

  6. Shanna says:

    Paula’s supposedly “unhealthy” cooking is exactly the reason I love her show. It’s REAL food; the way my grandparents used to cook for us. Home-cooked, rich, hearty, and delicious – something you could enjoy to its fullest extent, the way food is meant to be eaten. There is nothing wrong with taking pleasure in food.

    Thankfully no one thought to “count calories” back in days of yore and because of it we have sumptuous, stick-to-your-ribs recipes today. Sure, we all should eat a little healthier, but that alone can be accomplished by kicking the fast food habit and eating at home. Home-cooked meals are good for you, regardless if they’re a little fattier than normal now and again. No one fifty years ago went to the great, obsessive lengths we go to nowadays to make sure every meal is the exact, perfect, right balance of calories, carbs, & crap…and guess what, there was no obesity epidemic in our country then.

    Eat right, eat sensibly, and *relax*. If you’re freaking out every time you put a bit of food in your mouth over what it is and what it’s going to do to your body, you are never going to *enjoy* food, and food is one of our most simple, basic, and delightfully natural pleasures – bite into a juicy, perfectly ripe fruit and tell me that isn’t true! Enjoy food. Enjoy life.

  7. Barry says:

    I liked reading your blog…keep up the good work.

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